And I have (mostly) good news. The swim and run went extremely well - better than expected and I managed to cut 20 mins off my time from last year. I couldn't be happier about that. More on that in a minute.
The bad news is that I felt like crap on the bike portion of it (although I did average 17 mph) but more importantly, I somehow came home with the wrong wetsuit! It wouldn't be so bad if it truly were MY wetsuit, but noooo....I had borrowed Todd Lowe's sleeveless wetsuit but I came home with someone else's. Oops!
Back to the good news. This race turned out to be a turning point for me. I had previously had what might be called "panic attacks" in the water - I don't know if that's what they were but what I do know is that they were awful experiences....difficulty breathing, inability to swim, feelings of anxiety....always in the beginning of a triathlon. Never had these feelings during practice, only competition.
The weird thing is that I didn't have them at every race but did have them in two triathlons earlier this summer (Windsor and L2L). They were so bad that I came very close to turning around and going back to shore. At L2L, it took quite awhile for me to calm down and actually swim.
So, this Sunday I was determined to make this a better experience. I set up my transition area quickly, put on my wetsuit, quickly asked the gal next to me to take a picture of me (and I'm glad I did because I now I know exactly what my wetsuit looked like!), and headed down to the lake.
I chatted briefly with Jim Fuller, another Greeley-ite, and watched the sun come up over the horizon (it was about 6:15 AM). Very pretty and very calming. Then, slowly, I waded into the water and in what seemed like slow motion, I swam around the practice area....very, very slowly. Water temp was perfect - low 70's, I think.
Then I went back and stood with my wave and did some deep breathing exercises. I felt completely at ease. The gun went off and the women around dashed into the water and within an instant, it was a mad frenzy of black wetsuits and neon yellow swim caps.
I waded out and slowly began to swim. This is the point where I had previously felt anxious and like I couldn't breathe (not a good feeling when you're supposed to be swimming like mad). I started swimming and except for the "human washing machine", I felt fine. No anxiety at all. After a few mins I was able to position myself so that I could stretch out and actually start swimming. And I did, for a long, long time.
The first buoy finally came and I turned the corner effortlessly. Then somehow I got off course and came up and saw the other swimmers really far away (yikes!) so, I swam a little extra - oh well - I was enjoying myself enough that I didn't care that much.
Made it back to the beach with no trouble. My shoulders were sore and I thought to myself "I am no longer afraid to swim this distance (1.2 miles) but I do need to lift more weights!".
Off to T1 (transition one). Wetsuit came off quickly, onto my bike and off I go. Felt fine the first few miles, although I noticed lots of people passing me. Kept trying to get some speed but more people passed me. Pushed really hard up the hill and still, people passing me. Basically, the entire 56 miles were spent just like that: me pushing, pushing, pushing and more and more people passing me!
I do like the bike course. It's very scenic - countryside outside of Boulder, one of the prettiest places along the front range. I enjoyed watching the cyclists with their brightly-colored jerseys stream along the 2-lane country road with the famous flatirons in the distance. For a moment, I felt a sense of gratitude to be where I was - doing a triathlon (half-ironman, no less) at the ripe old age of 48. Not a bad life, I must say!
At the end of the bike, I was toast. My legs felt like lead. I got off quickly and as I put on my running shoes, I thought that I had lost so much time on the bike that I might as forget about improving my time from last year. Darn. I just need to finish this 13.1 mile run and call it a day.
I started the run feeling hot, tired, and thirsty. I had forgotten to grab my gu or get a swig of water before heading out on the run. Ugh. No shade and no aid station for at least a mile (which is long way to go when you're hot, tired, and thirsty).
The first few miles felt like a death march. I shuffled along and thought about how miserable I felt. Then, I thought, I don't want to stay out here any longer than I have to....I don't want to dwell on how bad i feel or how hot it is (mid-80's, which is HOT when you're running and you've already biked hard for 56 miles) so I'm going to do something strange: run faster so that I can just BE DONE!
Somehow I picked up the pace. My legs hurt even more. I slowed back down. Then I did it again and slowed back down. Then I passed the 4 mile mark and thought to myself "I only have 9 miles to go...that's not bad!" (see how delusional i was?!).... I went faster....then I passed the 6 mile mark, near the finish line with all the spectators screaming and I thought to myself "only 7 more miles - that's not bad!" and THEN, I looked at my watch and realized that if I hurry up, I could beat last year's time...by a lot!
Somehow that did it. I dug deep - very, very deep - and found some strength (and speed) lurking way down inside and I started to run fast. Very fast. I passed a lot of people (some i recognized from the bike who had passed me) and several people cheered me on. I got into a rhythm and couldn't break it. I could tell that it wouldn't last long and that I just needed to hang on for 6 more miles....then 5....then 4....then 3...then 2...then 1 and at this point I thought if I miss one step, I'll crash and burn big time. I kept going and pushed even harder, to the point of sprinting the last half-mile for the finish line.
I had never planned on running it this way but it just happened. I finished in 6 hours and 6 minutes, 20 mins faster than last year. But what I care about most, is how I was able to hang in there and mentally get myself to the finish line. That's what I will need in Florida - the mental capacity to keep going, to talk myself out of the pain and into the game.
It was a really good day. I think I just might be able to pull of an Ironman.
2 comments:
Great, great job winning the mental game there, Cindy.
I wonder if you were exhausted on the bike because kept passing you? That's pretty damn discouraging and, as a result, exhausting. That's one of the breakthroughs for me mentally this year is NOT to let people passing me get me down. In fact, when they do pass me, my thought now is, "Well, I'm not going out that fast because that's not my game plan." It really helps. Jenny, in fact, was way ahead of me at the Colorado Half and rather than get discouraged I thought, well, that's what Jenny does, and I wound up beating her by a minute.
Just a thought. You really should be proud of yourself.
Dan,
I AM proud of myself! I couldn't be happier with my performance on Sunday. I thought that came through on the blog. And Marshall had a different perspective on the bike thing - he said to expect that in Florida too because most triathletes train harder on the bike and are usually not good runners...that I'll get blown away on the bike but will catch people on the run. Its just the way it is. So, I'm totally ok with it. I'd like to be a little faster on the bike but hey, if I can run well that I'm fine with it. I do appreciate your advice, though, and was hoping you'd read my blog today! I almost emailed you to see what you thought but got caught up in a healthcare debate on FB...anyway, thanks much! And please know that I am VERY happy with my race on Sunday! Love ya, Cindy
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